When No One Cares, I Will Be No One
by TartanLioness
Summary: PG for swearwords, Nymphadora Tonks is tired of being reminded that she's clumsy and goes to the only person who never blamed her... Professor Minerva McGonagall... NOT AN NTMM ROMANCE!


Title: When No One Cares, I Will Be No One.

Author: Tartan Lioness

Classification: Angst I guess, surrogate mother/daughter relationship and a bit of romance…

Set: During Tonks' fifth school year

Summary: Poor Nymphadora Tonks has problems that no one care about… or so she thinks!

Disclaimer: All I own is the plot and Nigel McNamara. I have no money so please don't sue me!

A/N: This story was inspired by a scene in Lou. McGonagall's fic, 'Moments Like These'. Louisa was kind enough to let me write this one! Thanks to her and to Lily, my beta-reader!

Fifteen year old Nymphdora Tonks cried as she ran through the halls of Hogwarts. She hated them. She hated all of them. Her parents, her teachers, her classmates. For five years she had endured the constant reminder of how clumsy she was from nearly everyone at the school. She had hoped that when she was going to Hogwarts she could get away from all the taunting she knew from her home. Her parents had also constantly reminded her of her clumsy-ness, saying she had to be careful all the times, even if she only had to go get a glass to drink water off.

And so she ran towards the only person who never made fun of her or scolded her for knocking over something. Professor Minerva McGonagall. Tonks knew she was out past curfew and that the stern professor might get really angry at her but she had to talk to her.

Still crying, Tonks burst into Minerva's office without knocking and startled Minerva, who was sitting bent over her desk, correcting what looked like essays.

"Miss Tonks! What are you doing out…" she halted when she noticed the tears on Tonks' face. "What happened?" Minerva's voice changed from stern to a warm, motherly tone as she moved to stand in front of the neon-green haired, crying student.

"P-professor!" Tonks exclaimed and fell into Minerva's arms. Minerva hugged her tightly to her, rubbing her back and whispering soothing words.

After a while Tonks calmed down enough to pull away. "Sorry, Professor," she muttered, looking at the floor.

"Think nothing of it, Miss Tonks," was Minerva's gentle answer. "Now, lass, tell me what is wrong."

"It's – it's just them, Professor."

"Who?"

"All of them, my parents, my teachers, my classmates…"

"What did they do?"

"Why can they not bloody understand that I bloody well know that I am bloody clumsy! Why do they have to bloody remind me every five minutes! I BLOODY KNOW I'M BLOODY CLUMSY!"

"Calm yourself and watch your language, Miss Tonks! Now, what are they saying?"

"I knocked over a stack of parchment in the Common Room just a few minutes ago, Professor, and Nigel McNamara just felt it necessary to yell all over the Common Room that I'm a clumsy little brat. They all agreed. It's like they think I don't know I'm clumsy! They don't know how much it hurts to be reminded of your faults all the time." The tears had begun to fall again and she angrily whiped them away, thus knocking over Minerva's tin of Ginger Newts. At this she let out a strangled yelp and burried her face in her hands.

"Shh, lass… it's okay, it's okay," Minerva said, stroking Tonks' hair which was now a deep cobber red.

"Now, what about the teachers? Have _I_ done something?"

"N-no, Professor McGonagall, that's why I came here. You are the only one who hasn't ever scolded me because of my clumsy-ness. And Professor Dumbledore, but I was not going to tell him!"

"Why ever not? Not that I am not glad you came to me but why ever would you not talk to Professor Dumbledore?"

"He's the Headmaster, Professor," Tonks whispered.

"And I'm the Deputy Headmistress. Trust me, Miss Tonks, Al – Professor Dumbledore is a very perspective man. He would certainly not have rejected you. But that was a bit of a sidetrack. Now which teachers have made comments?"

"All of them. Mostly Snape," Tonks sneered his name.

"And what does _Professor_ Snape say?" she stressed the word 'Professor' to make Tonks remember that no matter how much she didn't like him, he was still her professor.

"A couple of days ago I knocked over a vial of frog eggs and he took off 50 points and told me that I do not belong in Potions, that being in Potions demanded full control over your actions. And then yesterday I managed to go through the entire lesson without knocking over or breaking anything and he sneered at me 'I see you made it through the lesson without any accidents, Miss Tonks. That's an improvement. But I still hope your potion is better that your body-control.' And the entire class laughed and he didn't even take off points. Not even from the Gryffindors! And you know how he is about us!"

"Oh dear. I will talk to Professor Snape about this, Miss Tonks. I promise I will."

"No, Professor, don't! I don't want them to think I can't handle it. They'll think I'm weak! And I'm not!" Minerva's sad little smile threw Tonks off.

"You sound so much like myself, Miss Tonks. I too was afraid of showing that I had feelings when they called me 'Teacher's Pet', 'Bookworm', 'The Brain', 'an insufferable know-it-all' and so on. But you see, I too went to a teacher, in my case Professor Dumbledore, and he helped me."

"But… Professor… that's not the same, is it? I mean… I must have been studious but…"

"Trust me, Miss Tonks. You'll never meet anyone who's more of a bookworm, a teacher's pet or insufferable know-it-all than I was. And I knew it. I knew that the teachers liked me, that I was a little goodie-goodie, but I also saw the other side of me, the side that only one other person had noticed. The person was Professor Dumbledore and the side was the mischevious, rebellious side. Yes, Miss Tonks, I was a little prankster but no one ever suspected me because I was 'such a nice girl'. I am sure that there is more to you than just your clumsy-ness. You are a Gryffindor. Therefore you are brave, bold. I suspect a desire to prove yourself worthy. And if I'm not very mistaken, you want to become an Auror, yes?" Tonks blushed when Minerva told her that she knew of her secret dream to be a member of the Auror Corp.

"Yes, Professor, you are right."

"I thought so. You, Miss Tonks, are worth more than you think. So don't you dare to go around thinking that it would be better to end it all," Minerva sternly whispered. Tonks looked at Minerva, shocked.

"Yes, Miss Tonks. I know that you have considered suicide an option. But listen to an old woman with quite a bit of experience; it's not. It's never an option."

"Professor…?"

"You don't have to say anything, Miss Tonks. You wonder how I know, right? Well, I know for two reasons. First of all because it's obvious that you are lonely and lonelyness can make you do many a crazy thing. Secondly, I was once where you are now, as I told you a little ago." Minerva pulled up her sleeve. "But I tried to do it the muggle way." Her arms were covered in scars. "But you see, Albus Dumbledore showed me that life is not something you just throw away. You have many years left to live in, Miss Tonks, and one day you'll know exactly why I listened to Albus. Now if you have listened to me, you will go back to your Dorm and go to sleep, knowing that someday you'll find your place in this world. There are people who loves you for who you are, Nymphadora Tonks. I am one of them."

"Y-you? Professor?"

"Yes, me. You see, as I told you, I can see a bit of myself in you and I will do anything to make sure that you come through the rest of your years here safe."

"Thank you, Professor," Tonks said and got up to leave.

"Goodnight, Miss Tonks. Do not hesitate to come to me again."

"I won't, Professor. Goodnight."

As the door closed behind the young girl, Minerva quietly said, "Good luck, lass. I'm here for you," before she made her way to the chambers she shared with her husband, Headmaster Albus Dumbledore.

"Hello, love. What is the matter?"

"Oh, Albus, I had a talk with Miss Tonks."

"She finally came to see you?"

"Yes, apparently it all became too much."

"She's so much like you were back then, Min."

"I know, Albus. She tries so hard not to show that she has feelings and yet if people would only look at her proberly and see _her_ instead of ony seeing the clumsy little girl, they'd see a fire-soul and yet a very vulnerable young woman. I just hope she'll find someone who will love her for her. Like I found you."

"She will, Minerva, I don't doubt that. She's a remarkable young girl."

"Yes, Albus she is," she said and kissed him. "I love you," she whispered.

"I love you too, Minerva."

THE END!

A/N: Yeah… I had to throw in the little AD/MM moment or it just wouldn't have been complete. Anyways, review please!


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